The Luncheon, by Christopher Fowler

 

"The Luncheon," by Christopher Fowler, in Playing Dead, edited by Martin Edwards, Severn House, 2025.

Something the English do better than us Yanks: portrayals of oh-so-sophisticated folks being oh-so-genteelly nasty to each other.

Amanda and Madeline are meeting for lunch for the first time in three years.  The obvious question is why are they meeting at all since they obviously despise each other. 

 Madeline owns a cosmetics company.  She fired Amanda who sued for wrongful dismissal and won a lot of money and used it to start her own company.  Madeline, in fine twisted form, says that means "I was able to give you the opportunity to get started."

Amanda is plotting revenge.  Madeline has a counter-strategy.  I won't go into detail here but it is a treat to watch these two masters sparring.  

Come Forth and Be Glad in the Sun, by Mat Coward

"Come Forth and Be Glad in the Sun," by Mat Coward, in Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine, March/April 2025. 

This is the tenth story I have reviewed by Mat Coward and, good grief, the second this month.

What should the opening sentence of a short story do?  The only thing it must do is make you want to read the second sentence.

But it can do so much more.  For instance: 

* It can set the mood.

* It can tell you something about the plot.

* It can introduce one or more characters.

Now try out this for an opening gambit:

"Of all the people we have ever kidnapped, you are by far the rudest."

* Mood: Farce.

* Plot: Kidnapping.

* Character: At least two serial kidnappers, one of them grumpy.  At least one victim, apparently rude.

Did it make you want to keep reading?  It sure did for me.

Gemma and Nathan, sister and brother, are the victims.  They refer to their captors as Nice and Snitty Nappers. (Snitty, of course, is the one who complains about their manners.) We learn a lot about their personalities.  Nathan is the genius who never found anything to do with his life. Gemma is the grouchy businesswoman who runs an escape room business.

And as for the Nappers, they explain that they are "permanent security consultants" but their boss is getting old and it "had been ages since they'd last been required to consult anyone concerning their security and their baseball bats and steel-capped boots were growing old with neglect." 

This is a delightful tale with some wild plot turns.
    

The Scarlatti Skip, by Richard Helms

"The Scarlatti Skip," by Richard Helms, in Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine, January/February 2025.

 This is the twelfth story by Helms to reach this blog.

Private eye Eamon Gold does a lot of skip tracing for bail bonders but this assignment is more preventative: Keep an eye on the Fiddle Killer and make sure she doesn't run. So why is Veronica Scarlatti called the Fiddle Killer? 

"'Darren Wojohowski was learning to play,' Doogie said.  'According to the police reports, his progress was slow. His girlfriend Veronica became irritated and emptied her revolver into the violin. Tragically it was tucked under Darren's chin at the time.'"

Some of us may be inclined to sympathize.  But Veronica, an attractive young woman, knows she is looking at "twenty years in a box."  She swears she just wants to spend the last few days in unsupervised peace, but Eamon is being paid to keep her under supervision. 

You will not be surprised to know she makes a run for it.  Things get complicated.  Then they get worse.  A very enjoyable story.