The Three Camillas, by William Burton McCormick

"The Three Camillas," by William Burton McCormick, Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine,  July/August 2019.

This is the third appearance here by McCormick and the second for Quintus the Clever.  But our hero, if that's the right word, takes a while to arrive.

The story is set during the rule of Caligula the mad in the Roman empire.  The narrator is Camilla Tertia, which is to say, the third Camilla.  ("Siblings with identical names, especially amongst girls, were common in conservative and affluent families...")

Tertia is twelve and, she reports proudly, "already considered far and wide the scoundrel and gossip of the family."  Reports have not been exaggerated.

Her sister Secunda is about to make an unhappy marriage.  Tertia decides it can be prevented if her expensive engagement ring is lost - a bad omen!  And who better to make it disappear than the luckless thief she meets after he is caught and whipped?

Quintus is clever enough to want nothing to do with her - what's Latin for hellcat? - but she doesn't give him much choice.  The best part of the story is their conversations.

"Be an honest man, Quintus, and rob my sister!"

The Tourist, by B.K.Stevens

"The Tourist," by B.K.Stevens, in Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine, July/August 2019.

This is the second appearance on this page by my fellow SleuthSayer,the late B.K. Stevens.


They'd brought him no joy, those first three murders...

So the story begins.

Where do you hide a leaf?  In a forest.  And of there is no forest?  You create one.  G.K. Chesterton had Father Brown say that that was a fearful sin. Ecologists might disagree, but now we are scrambling our metaphor.

Charles has decided to kill his annoying wife.  He want to disguise it as the work of a serial killer.  That means killing several other women first, creating his own forest, so to speak.

Of course, if you have read a few hundred crime stories you know something is going to go wrong with this clever plot.  The question is: what will the fatal problem be?  I certainly didn't see it coming.

My favorite part is that the event I expected to be the climax is tossed off in a sentence. Hell, in a clause.  Lovely bit of misdirection there,.

I don't know if this will be B.K.'s last published piece.  If so, it is a good note to go out on.

Spirit River Dam, by Susan Daly

"Spirit River Dam," by Susan Daly, in The Best Laid Plans, edited by Judy Penz Sheluk, Superior Shores Press, 2019.

There is art forgery, of course, but there is also art fraud.

What would you do if you found a painting that appears in every way to be a fine example of a painting by a famous (and profitable) artist - except for the tiny detail that it is dated a few years after his death?  What if that date is in pencil and easy to erase?

That's the dilemma faced by art dealer Imogen when her ex-husband shows up with a painting he inherited from his late mother.  Just a little erasure will make the painting a treasure!  What could possibly go wrong?

For an answer, please see the title of the anthology.

The story has a very clever surprise.

Ladies Day at the Olympia Car Wash, by Andrew Nette

"Ladies Day at the Olympia Car Wash," by Andrew Nette, in A Time For Violence, edited by Andy Rausch and Chris Roy, Close to the Bone, 2019.

Welcome to Australia.  The narrator works at a car wash, a job his friend Buddha got him as a reward for not fingering him after an unsuccessful robbery.  Buddha wants to try another crime but our hero, having been burned with a term in prison is shy about trying again.  Then a woman comes to the car wash, needing some special treatment for her vehicle...

This story is mostly about mood.  For example:

Just after nine and already the temperature is in the early thirties according to the announcer on the classic hits radio station that gets piped through the speaker on the office wall.

"Going to be a hot one today," I say, trying to change the subject.

"Yeah, suppose so."  Buddha drops his half-smoked nail on the ground next to the grey tray of dirty sand labelled Please deposit cigarette butts here.

'Mocking Season, by Christi Clancy

"'Mocking Season," by Christi Clancy, in Milwaukee Noir, edited by Tim Hennessy, Akashic Press, 2019.

The publisher sent me an advance reading copy of this book.

This is a disturbing story, and I mean that as a compliment.  Here is how it starts:

Back when there were still trees in Whitefish Bay, the boys started sleeping in the hammocks they hung from them.

All sorts of things are foreshadowed in that simple sentence.

Whitefish Bay is apparently a pleasant bit of suburbia until it disturbed by the arrival of Erin, who we might perhaps call a middle-aged hippy.  She lived in the one home that was not visible from the street, which disturbs the keepers of community norms, "the mothers," who feel that "It didn't seem right to live where you couldn't be seen."

More importantly, her son Leif was so charismatic that all the boys in the neighborhood start to copy him - including 'mocking, or sleeping outdoors in hammocks.  They also take up marimba, an instrument at which Leif is expert.

But what disturbs the mothers even more is that Erin lets her yard run wild.  While everyone else is battling bugs and weeds with ever increasing doses of of chemicals, she listens to her boyfriend Cody, a horticulturalist who takes a more organic route.  This leads to conflict which leads to, well. other things.

You may say that the reactions of some of the characters are unrealistic, but that is precisely what makes the story so disturbing.   It reminded me of a certain novel and a certain short story, but that would be giving away too much.

A fine story.

Up Day Down Day Deadly Day, by Ellen Larson

"Up Day Down Day Deadly Day," by Ellen Larson, in Murder Most Edible, edited by Verona Rose, Rita Owen, and Shawn Reilly Simmons, 2019.

This is Larson's second appearance here.

I have written here before about didactic mysteries, tales which teach you about some subject as you enjoy the story.  This is a good example.

The narrator is the police chief of a small town in New York.  He has joined a group called the Slim Janes, not for professional reasons, but to watch his diet.  Oops!  Don't call it a diet.  They call it a Way of Eating, or WOE. 

And he is learning so much about WOEs that his head is swimming, but then he is called away on a case.  Becca, one of the groups leaders, is hospitalized after a bad reaction to food.  Allergy?  Poison?  Shoddy vegan supplements?

To get to the bottom of it all the chief has to learn a lot about how different diets work.  It's clever, informative, and best of all, the solution really does depend on what he learns.

My Companion, by Janice Law.

"My Companion," by Janice Law, in Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine,May/June 2019.

Before we get to the main event, I want to point something out.  This issue contains a story by  William Burton McCormick The introductory note points out that McCormick "made the  SleuthSayers list for Best Short Stories of the Year in 2016."  I believe that is the first time an editor made note in writing of my annual best fest.  Nice to be noticed.

This is the sixth appearance here by my friend and fellow SleuthSayer.

Jess is a poor little rich girl.  What she really wants is a puppy but her very busy parents say a real dog is too much trouble, so they get her a fake canine from a company called My Companions.
 
Mom explains: "My Companion has a repertoire of phrases that come loaded, but the neat thing, Jess, is that this toy learns.  As you talk to it, it learns and responds!  Now, isn't that better than a puppy?"

Meh.  But after a particularly bad day at school Jess talks to the fake dog whom she names Piper. 

And Piper talks back.  Sure enough, his personality does develop. In particular, he takes a deep interest in Daddy's collection of fine and expensive art...

Jess is lonely and depressed but she isn't dumb.  She sees what is going on, but what should she do about it?  A haunting little tale.