"Pain-Man," by Bev Vincent, in Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine, July/August 2017.
Last week, a long novella about drug deals, car thefts, and murder in specific rural landscape. This week a short, funny tale of a Walter Mitty-type in Boston. You never know where the pursuit of the Best of the Week will take you.
Raymond is a widower, pushing sixty, and waking up with new aches and complaints everyday. One day he blundeers into a bank robbery and is both injured and humiliated by one of the robbers. So Raymond decides to become a superhero. Naturally.
We then follow his training regime, his setbacks, and Pain-Man's eventual rematch with his nemesis. Read the story. It will take your mind off your aches and ouchies.