Pitchapalooza, by Robert Parker

 "Pitchapalooza," by Robert Parker, in Black Cat Weekly, #253, 2026. 

The main character  of this tale is Geneva Slitherbee (great name). Notice I didn't call her the heroine, cause heroic, she ain't.  She is a literary agent attending Pitchapalooza where "wannabe writers... for the price of their conference registration and some 50 bucks or so per pitch... get five minutes to convince an agent just to consider looking at their years of writing."

We quickly learn that Geneva is not taking their work seriously but we can hardly blame her considering the quality of the pitches we hear about.  "Think Dirty Harry meets Night of the Living Dead meets Bridget Jones's Diary," one wannabe urges.  We'd rather not. 

Is there a crime here, other than collecting those fees for allegedly listening to pitches?  There is.  Is this story funny? Oh, yes.

I admit the ending isn't as strong as I hoped, but a good time will be had on the way. 

 

Splitting Adams, by Percy Spurlock Parker

"Splitting Adams," by Percy Spurlark Parker, in Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine, July 2014. 

Terry Adams is a very unhappy man.  He's not good with women and he blames it on his big brother Jerry.  Jerry is slick and smooth and always moves in on Terry when he is trying to get started with a new lady. 

It has just happened again and Terry, well, Terry is about to lose it.

A clever piece of flash fiction.